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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29272689">The Wayward Flock: A Jarett Howarth Mystery</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/blue_pointer/pseuds/blue_pointer'>blue_pointer</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>A Glorious Retelling [56]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Critical Role (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>A lil fluff at the end, Acting, Addict Scanlan, Canon Timeline, Detective Jarett, Don't copy to another site, Drinking, Drunken Shenanigans, Drunken Speech Impediments, Episode: c01e069 Passed Through Fire, Grog Is a Good Egg, Lip reading, M/M, Minor Keyleth/Vax'ildan (Critical Role), Not a Mystery, POV Jarett Howarth, Rivalry, Sandkheg's Hide, Spies &amp; Secret Agents, The Princess Bride References, Vax'ildan the Moody, conversations in Marquesian, minor Jarett Howarth/Vex'ahlia, read for filth, the library is OPEN, unworthy dog</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 03:35:00</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,057</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29272689</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/blue_pointer/pseuds/blue_pointer</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Jarett goes drinking with Vox Machina, and some secrets are revealed. (Jarett's POV)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Grog Strongjaw &amp; Pike Trickfoot, Jarett Howarth &amp; Grog Strongjaw, Kynan Leore &amp; Vax'ildan, Shaun Gilmore/Jarett Howarth</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>A Glorious Retelling [56]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1975831</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Wayward Flock: A Jarett Howarth Mystery</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>With no small amount of regret, Jarett watched Zaahir Kadin pull his cane out from the satchel of holding and begin his walk to the mansion in the distance alone. The man wore his heart on his sleeve always, and he was clearly disappointed not to be accompanied. Truthfully, and by imperial law, it was a crime he did not have his own escort everywhere he went. But tonight, Jarett had work to do with Vox Machina. They had much information to impart, and wresting it from them never took long. However, it would require Jarett to be away from the Gilt D’amour for at least a few hours. Hopefully Zaahir Kadin would forgive him. Right now, he needed sleep more than anything, in any case.</p><p>Jarett looked over his would-be employers, along with the sullen man-boy he was expected to turn into a proper fighter. He watched the goliath pull aside the unworthy dog and speak to him on the wisdom of keeping a recent adversary so close to their bosom. </p><p>“You’re sure he’s...clean?” Grog asked.</p><p>“I might like to have Pike take a look at him in the morning, but I think so.”</p><p>The lovely Vex’ahlia asked why her brother shouldn’t have Pike do so now, and the cleric asked who the boy was. Jarett remembered Kynan. He’d been so keen to join Vox Machina, he’d set up his tent outside the keep for days. He’d been just a child, a ridiculous fanboy, and Jarett had only allowed him to stay to see what Vax’ildan would do. It had proved amusing. </p><p>But now, what remained of that boy was haunted, spiteful, sullen and full of regret. “He was traveling with Ripley, Pike,” Vex’ahlia said, as if that explained everything. </p><p>If Jarett was not mistaken, they were referring to Ana Ripley, Prince Percival’s once mentor, and the treasonous royal alchemist who had betrayed the de Rolos to the diabolical Briarwoods. If it was truly she who had been Kynan’s master, Jarett agreed with Grog. Putting him down now could save them all a catastrophe in the future. </p><p>Jarett watched as Pike stepped forward to cast some spell of Judgement on the boy. It was eerie to watch her read the boy’s very nature like an open book. All Jarett knew was that he would die before anyone cast such a spell on him. Though, when Zaahir Kadin had cast the truth-telling spell on him weeks ago, it had just tingled, and not in an unpleasant way. Jarett was convinced that was only because Zaahir Kadin had been the one to cast it, though.</p><p>The gnome ended her summation by giving Kynan a bit of trite, optimistic advice. “You just need to turn that frown upside-down.” It was signature Pike. Jarett just shook his head to himself. It seemed to cheer up Vox Machina, though. </p><p>“I have a lot to think about. I have a lot of penance to deal with. Thank you,” the boy said. “Maybe a drink would help.” </p><p>“Alright, then,” Jarett stepped up, patting Kynan on the shoulder. “Let’s get this pup trashed! Follow me.” He led the way down the street to the newly-christened Wayward Flock tavern and ordered them all a round of ale. </p><p>Before the drinks were even served, Grog spoke up. “Wait, Jarett! While we were in your hood…”</p><p>“Yes?” This should be good, whatever it was. Grog looked far too excited.</p><p>“I acquired this delicious little bit.” The goliath reached into the party’s bag of holding and produced...could it be? An entire bottle of sandkheg’s hide? Jarett shouldn’t have been surprised. Vox Machina liked to party, and self-destruction was their middle name. “This is called...Seraph’s...Swine...Swallow?” the goliath said, clearly having forgotten the name, if he’d ever known it. He poured Jarett a shot. </p><p>Why not? Jarett decided to play along. Pretending to get roofied would be a good cover for his intel collection tonight. “I am not familiar with this,” he said, taking the glass from Grog. “You say this is from Ank’Harel?” There was a time Jarett had built up an immunity to the stuff. It was lovely for “accidental” interrogations. But the venom was in such short supply outside of Marquet, Jarett had stopped using it long ago. </p><p>Grog instructed him to shoot it. They were so corrupt, even on a personal level like this, Vox Machina never failed to disappoint him. When the others started to look nervous and protest, Jarett knew he had to do it. With a trusting look, he raised his glass. “To friends?”</p><p>“Friends!” the unworthy dog cried out, not even touching his own glass of ale, the bastard. That was fine. The more he hated Jarett, the more powerful Jarett became. </p><p>“To friends, and to health!” Grog declared, also not holding a drink of his own. A pathetic set-up if Jarett had ever seen one. Deception was clearly not their forte.</p><p>“Friends!” Princess Keyleth giggled, knowing precisely what was about to happen. Her moral high horse was clearly lame.</p><p>“And to survival,” Jarett said, giving the goliath a look. </p><p>“Maybe just sip it,” Scanlan said, looking very guilty. Behind him, sweet Vex’ahlia was motioning wildly for Jarett not to drink it. And that was why he would always love her. </p><p>Grog stumbled over his tongue, attempting to pronounce “fusaka.” These Tal’Doreians. So charmingly xenophobic. As the whole group began to laugh, Jarett paused with the glass still raised in toast. He glanced from Grog to Vex’ahlia, aiming his last toast at her. “To friends and trust.” She covered her mouth, groaning guiltily as Jarett knocked it back. </p><p>Even Grog released a quiet, “Oh shit.” to see him do it.</p><p>“It’s so worth it,” the unworthy dog said with a nasty grin.</p><p><em>Someday, dog. Someday...</em>  </p><p>Feeling guilty, because Grog was one of the most kind-hearted of them all, the goliath grabbed an empty glass and poured a double shot into it for himself. “Can’t let him take this ride by himself,” he said to the twins, and pounded the entire thing. </p><p>Jarett made a show of feeling the sudden numbness in his lips, gums, tongue, throat, and esophagus. “That wath quite thtrong,” he said, looking confused. </p><p>“I think so, too,” Grog slurred. Jarett was impressed with him for taking a dose of his own medicine. </p><p>He grinned ridiculously at Grog as his face went numb, declaring, “You fucker!” All the others laughed. “Well, I’m not going to have any converthation for a while.” And there was Jarett’s pre-packaged excuse for sitting and listening for the rest of the night. </p><p>“You’re talking really funny,” Grog said--or at least that was Jarett’s best guess for what Grog had said. The venom had done very odd things to his pronunciations. Jarett pointed and laughed at him, and Grog laughed with him. “Let’s braid each other’s hair,” Grog suggested. Now he was just pretending to be more drunk than he was. </p><p>“Pleathe don’t. I think that I have far more than you do, and it’th too short, anyway. Be a wathte of your time,” Jarett told him. Silly half-giant. Jarett watched the unworthy dog order more drinks, presumably for his princess and himself, set them on the table near her and then move to the next table over, where Kynan was lurking. </p><p>Jarett pretended to be smashed in order to turn and read their lips as the dog spoke to his boy. Vax’ildan spun a tale of guilt and woe, of a mentor, broken-hearted without his estranged apprentice. What was he playing at? Moreover, was this yet another person the dog was going to betray Zaahir Kadin for? A butcher’s boy? Oh, the melodramatic apologies! Woe and agony and thrice again woe! This from the unworthy dog who could not even apologize for his daily mistreatment of the Gilt D’amour. </p><p>Apparently this was meant to be a pep talk from unworthy dog to pup. There was a suspicious energy between the pup and Princess Keyleth, between all three of them, it seemed. That was something to look into further. And was Vax’ildan the Moody actually attempting to persuade someone else to stop moping and do something constructive with his life? Jarett had not noted on the calendar this morning that it was Irony Day. </p><p>The conversation ended with the unworthy dog admitting he was a dick and Kynan promising to do his best. How touching. They were like two peas in a pod. Jarett had found out all he wanted to know at this point. He turned back to having nonsense conversations with Grog, surreptitiously eavesdropping on the others all the while. </p><p>“It ith great to have all of you back, and I hope my hometown wath very kind to all of you. I do miss it, and perhapth when all thith ith thaid and done, and I can get a proper--maybe a writ of approval from you folkth here at Whitethtone…” Though Jarett knew full well the de Rolo name was worth nothing to the emperor, even if Prince Percival decided to be so generous at some point. “Maybe they can abtholve me of a couple of thingth on the bookth I would like to thay goodbye to.” </p><p>Grog and Vex giggled madly at his numbed accent. “I can’t understand what you’re saying,” Grog slurred.</p><p>“<b>I</b> can’t underthtand what I’m thaying,” Jarett countered. “Where did you get thith?” </p><p>“It is the best!” Grog declared.</p><p>“It’th pretty great.” Jarett nodded. It was at that very moment that Pike seemed to come out of a stupor and ask about the sandkheg’s hide. Both Grog and Princess Keyleth encouraged her to try some.</p><p>“You have to have thome,” Jarett joined in the peer pressure. “It’s not very tathty, I’ll tell you that. But lemme tell you what it will do, ith thith.” And of course, the tiny gnome was always up to a drinking challenge. She took the first shot like it was nothing. </p><p>Jarett had seen this before, many times. The venom only took immediate effect on 60% of the population. For the rest, it took a little bit longer, which often led to assumptions of immunity, or unusually strong constitutions. He knew what came next. Before the first drought took effect, Pike immediately demanded another. She was in for a rough morning tomorrow; Jarett did not envy her. “A thecond shot? That ith obviouthly very brave of you, Pike,” he told her. </p><p>“Yes, she’s got quite the tolerance,” Grog slurred proudly, just moments before Pike fell face-down on the ground, fully unconscious. Of course, her bosom friends all laughed and cheered this. True friends. Though Jarett supposed, as Pike was a cleric, if she’d broken her nose, she could also mend it once she was conscious again. </p><p>Grog looked down at her. “Pike? Piiiiiiiike?” But of course there was no answer. The goliath picked her up by her shirt to make sure his adopted sister was still alive. Pike hung there limply, snoring quite peacefully. “Well, that’s one way to go for the night,” Grog declared.</p><p>“I think thith ith an important lethon for all of uth,” Jarett began. “At leatht the two of uth--no more of that.” </p><p>Grog agreed and put the bottle back into his bag of holding. “Did you know it comes from a venomous part of a big animal?”</p><p>Jarett appeared horrified. “You should have prefathed that before we had a drink!”</p><p>“Didn’t I say that?” Grog’s voice went up high, because he was still feeling guilty for having drugged Jarett. Good.</p><p>“No!” Jarett shouted, sounding offended.</p><p>“Oh, that was my fault,” the goliath apologized before carrying Pike’s limp body over to a booth to gently lay her down. </p><p>“Ah, it’th fine,” Jarett told him. “Too late now.” </p><p>While Grog did that, Scanlan waddled over to Jarett and pulled him aside. This should be interesting. And it was. The gnome claimed to have political influence with J’mon Sa Ord now, and produced a medal with the imperial crest. Under no circumstances would Vox Machina have been able to leave the city alive after having stolen such an artifact, so there must have been some truth to Scanlan’s story. All the same, Jarett called bullshit on the gnome’s tale. Not just because it was in character for Jarett Howarth, but because it would force Scanlan to reveal more information. </p><p>Scanlan claimed he could use his influence to get Jarett cleared of his crimes with the Hand. Which was ridiculous. He clearly had no idea how Ank’Harel’s judicial system worked. When Jarett claimed he was too drunk to have this conversation, Grog--who Jarett didn’t even realize had been listening in--encouraged him to take Scanlan’s offer. </p><p>“You’re telling me that you made friendth with J’mon Sa Ord?” Jarett asked. When pigs flew. Sure, the emperor might have given them an audience out of boredom and curiosity. The fact they’d survived it was a miracle in and of itself. But no way had they left with the emperor’s favor. Not if the unworthy dog had been in attendance. Jarett was not buying a single copper of the gnome’s story.</p><p>Scanlan claimed they were now bosom friends of the emperor, and he could get Jarett’s record expunged. Playing to the groundlings, Jarett acted far more drunk than he was, saying, “Then pleathe do,” and chuckling at his own drunkenness. Of course, then it was Scanlan’s turn to ask a favor of him. </p><p>Drugs? Jarett played dumb, forcing the gnome to go through every euphemism he knew for what he wanted. But this was uncomfortable. What about <em> him </em> made Scanlan think Jarett was the one to source illegal substances for him? No, he was drunk. It was a coincidence, surely. Scanlan had just found the closest servant to hand, that was all. Still. Jarett did not like where this was going. If Jarett did what the gnome wanted, he risked compromising himself in the process of pretending to be a loyal servant. </p><p>When Scanlan insisted that Jarett knew people, he wondered briefly how much it would affect the party if the gnome were to simply...disappear one night. This was getting into dangerous territory. And it seemed the gnome had just got a wild hair up his ass, because he’d never even heard of suude. Ridiculous little man. </p><p>“You confuthe me, gnome!” Jarett told him.</p><p>“I’m confused, too!” Scanlan said.</p><p>“Look, ath your employee, thith ith a very uncomfortable converthation to have,” Jarett pointed out. Scanlan insisted it wouldn’t affect their professional relationship. But it already had. Finally, Jarett said he might be able to send a courier to get some suude, but he had far too much to do here in Whitestone to get the gnome’s supply personally. </p><p>“It’s okay, it’s okay. Just try your best,” Scanlan said. The strangest drug trafficking agreement ever conceived. </p><p>“Alright,” Jarett reluctantly agreed.</p><p>“I believe in you.” </p><p>Jarett just stared back at him, uninspired. “Thankth.” </p><p>“You’re the betht.” It was literally impossible for the jester to go four sentences without mocking someone.</p><p>“Now you’re jutht making fun of me,” Jarett accused. Scanlan denied it, and reminded Jarett that he could get his name cleared in Ank’Harel. Jarett just sighed, knowing it was all bullshit and annoyed to have one more thing to do. But it might be worth it to see what a suude addiction would do to the little bastard. </p><p>After ironically stating that nothing would please him more than to get Scanlan his drugs, Jarett excused himself. “Alright, I need to thleep thith off, whatever thith ith. Good night, everyone,” he said, looking only at Vex’ahlia. “Thee you in the morning.” </p><p>She was the only one of the lot to bid him goodnight, and Jarett wouldn’t have had it any other way. He’d found out all he could for now, and Jarett could see the longer he stayed, the more ridiculous they--and their requests of him--were going to become. </p><p>Jarett stumbled out of the tavern, more affected still by the venom then he thought he’d be by now, and made his way to Zaahir Kadin’s as best he could. When he arrived, he found the first floor was empty of all but the cleric girl with the unpleasant disposition. Feeling too warm, Jarett made his way upstairs, beginning to shed his clothes as he went. By the time he reached the Gilt D’amour’s bedroom door, Jarett was down to just his pants. </p><p>He opened the door slowly so as not to wake his sleeping target. But even from this distance, Jarett could tell Zaahir Kadin was sleeping very soundly. Good. He deserved it. Without fanfare, Jarett crossed the room and shucked his pants before slipping beneath the sheets. He moved right up against Zaahir Kadin, eager for that feel of skin on skin, only to find that the Gilt D’amour’s umber curves were even hotter to the touch than Jarett felt. </p><p>He refused to let go, throwing back the blankets and wrapping an arm around the sleeping prince as Jarett settled in beside him. His head was already spinning from the poison. Nasty stuff. As Jarett drifted off, he tried to recall the recipe for his morning cure-all. He was going to need it. </p><p>Feeling another nude body against his own, Zaahir Kadin rolled over and wrapped his arms around Jarett, pulling him even closer. Thank g-d he was too drunk for the blood to be flowing properly right now. All the same, Jarett thought it only fair to steal a kiss before closing his eyes. Zaahir Kadin moaned against his lips, ever starving for affection, and all would have been lost if Jarett had been sober. <em> “Love me, J’arett,” </em>he murmured, for all Jarett could see, still very much asleep. </p><p><em> “I beg you give me until the morning, my lord,” </em> Jarett told him. <em> “Just a few more hours and I will be </em> <em> eager </em><em>to comply.” </em></p><p>Zaahir Kadin nodded and murmured something unintelligible before tucking his head beneath Jarett’s chin and falling into a deep sleep. Somewhere deep inside the drunken jaded man, a boy’s heart was dancing. To think that he could ever have ended up here, in the arms of the Heart of the Soul, after seeking him across oceans and following him over continents for so many years. It was a dream come true. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Kadin is a title.<br/>Zaahir is one of Gilmore's names of record in Ank'Harel.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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